Social Suicide Girl

After searching from late 2006 I finally have a steady job. It is technically a temp assignment but there is no official end date and the company says they want me there for a good while. There was another girl Shirin who was doing part-time along with me but her other job offered her more hours so she quit Friday afternoon. We were both doing around 4 hours a day but now that she has left I am almost certain that my hours will increase to 5-6 a day.

It may seem selfish but as much as I got along with Shirin I am a little glad that she has left. I did more of the work than she did, I get to work before she did and I'd often leave after she did. Plus with the certainty that my hours will increase I will have more money to save for some things I want over the next couple years and I will be able to pay back the $8000 or so that I owe the parents combined.

I still haven't made up mind about what I have said on twitter that I am considering doing on 20th August 2011. Some days are good and others aren't I live so close to so many people and yet I am isolated, not just by me but they have isolated me too. I constantly feel as though I am not important and that I do not matter to people. And the one person I did start to trust ended up treating me like shit. His actions towards me and other people have landed him in a psychiatric ward as an in patient and I don't know how long he'll be there for. What he did shattered the little trust I was beginning to develop with people. His stalking, his manipulation of my emotions and the emotions of others and his lies ruined that.